The Darkness is a Blanket: Cascadia Fog Comfort Tea with Hawthorn
3am is the loneliest time to be awake, at first. The rest of the world is tucked in to sleep. The chatter of daily life has quieted, whether you live in the woods or the city. The thick blanket of darkness can feel stifling, cloying, as you struggle to emerge from a nightmare or unrelenting pain. But after enough 3am’s, you start to get used to them. You notice the gentle respirations of your house, the soft hummings of appliances or the creaking of settling. That heaviness stops feeling so coarse and turns into velvet, and then into silk, a flowy force that can be manipulated, even danced with.
Some people’s lifestyle or jobs have them awake at 3am, when it is business as usual, perhaps even a time of socialization. This post isn’t for them (Though they are still welcome, of course.) It’s for the ones who are awake because they are hurting or haunted or scared. Eventually you will learn to let the softness of the witching hour hold you, start to find comfort in the little sounds, the rise and fall of your breathing, the intense quietude that can feel both stifling and soft. The minutes will keep passing, I promise. Soon enough you’ll start to see the bleed of pre-dawn reveal shadows in its soft luminescence. The chorus will start up - gentle at first, then a crescendo - birdsong, the first sounds of traffic, the stirring of life out in the world again. Then, my dear, you can let go. You did it. You made it through another night. You may not feel it now, but every one of those nights is transforming you. You are becoming the holder of beautiful dualities. You are being hardened, like the strength of a tree over decades. You are melting into softness as the darkness equalizes all. You are learning yourself and your shadows. You are finding wisps of comfort in the dark. Wrap the night around you like a cloak or perhaps a blanket. Dawn will come soon enough. You’ve almost made it.
Soon, you’ll be swimming up through the depths, the layers of light revealing themselves as you find shallower waters. Up you’ll go, from inky blackness to soft blues and greys to the effervescent moments just before sunrise. Drink it in. Notice the shadows. Let yourself feel the expansion of your lungs as the first light washes over you.
Out of the Depths Tisane with Hawthorn:
The base of this comforting tea is gathered around hawthorn blossoms and leaves. Hawthorn is said to be a protective herb of the heart, and has been used for thousands of years for both the literal heart (as in strengthening the circulatory system) and the metaphorical heart (as in offering a resilient protection of our vulnerable emotions.) Hawthorn itself is a poetic play of dualities; long sharp thorns protect the delicate clusters of white blossoms that adorn its branches in the spring. Gathering hawthorn must be done slowly, with care and attention. Hawthorn asks us to slow down, to get in our bodies, to feel what we need to feel… but at the same time, it has the presence of a trusted hand on your shoulder, a comforting company that will be there as long as you need. You know how sometimes you carry a heavy weight in your belly all day but it isn’t until you are in the embrace of a trusted friend that the tears gush out? Hawthorn is that friend. Warm and unconditionally loving, this plant will be with you to feel what you need to feel. That might seem like a lot of personification for a plant, but I feel that energy so strongly when I work with it. Perhaps you will too.
Joining hawthorn is the spicy-floral fragrance of bergamot, which is usually associated with Earl Grey tea. This represents deep comfort to me, personally; I have associated Earl Grey tea with self-care since I had a profound experience as a teen about letting go of expectations and listening to what my body was telling me. It called me to my senses like nothing else had. It’s almost as if it pulled me down from my headspace and back into the seat of my body. “You are whole, and you deserve rest,” it whispers.
Two calming blue flowers accent the soothing nature of this blended tisane: cornflower petals saved from slow walks last summer, and butterfly pea blossoms. Both have a delicate flavor that compliments the blend, and both are known for their relaxing effects on the body. The butterfly pea flowers also give this blend a rich blue color, which reminds me of the eerie light of pre-dawn when used in the latte recipe below. The final ingredient to round out this blend is vanilla powder, which just emphasizes the comfort and sweetness of slow moments sipping tea. It’s because of this that I strongly recommend using press and seal tea bags or re-usable canvas bags, since the fine vanilla powder will sink down to the bottom of the mix if not incorporated correctly.
This blend is a wonderful thing to assemble on a good day, then save for those 3am moments when they do come. It’s also a thoughtful gift to a friend who is struggling, especially when accompanied by your presence and a willingness to just be there as your friend feels what they feel. Readers local to Boise, Idaho can find most of the ingredients at The Vervain Collective. I’ve also linked to sources for each to make this as easy as possible for you.
Ingredients:
15 drops Bergamot essential oil
About 2 Tbs. Vanilla bean powder
.25 oz (about ⅔ c.) Cornflower petals
1 oz (about 1 ¼ c.) Butterfly pea flowers
2 oz (about 1 ¼ c.) Hawthorn leaves and flowers
Press and Brew Tea Bags, optional
Directions:
In a medium bowl, toss together the cornflower petals, butterfly pea flowers, and hawthorn leaves and flowers.
Add the bergamot essential oil to a sterilized mason jar, then put the lid on and give it a good shake to disperse the oil throughout the inner surface. Add the botanical mixture and continue to shake until everything has an even fragrance of bergamot and no oil remains on the inside of the glass.
Spoon the tea blend into individual bags but do not seal. Once it is distributed, add a pinch (or 1/8tsp.) of vanilla bean powder to each individual bag. Press and seal according to package directions, then store in an airtight container to keep your blend fresh and fragrant.
Cascadia Fog Latte
This beautiful and soothing tea latte is inspired by the classic London Fog: Earl Grey tea with vanilla steamed milk. This version is definitely rooted in the Pacific Northwest’s foggy mornings. It’s the color of pre-dawn and carries a little more wilderness in its flavor than the properly tame inspiration behind it. It’s wonderful for frazzled nerves and insomnia, but is also a lovely and gentle way to start the day as well. This caffeine-free drink really shines with foamed milk, so if you don’t have a fancy milk steamer, use one of my tricks: a few minutes in a high-speed blender, some pumping in a French Press coffee maker, or one of these nifty things that creates a perfectly foamed latte on-the-go. (Sidenote: really want to impress your friends while camping or backpacking? Sneak one of these into your knapsack. Little luxuries like a foamy latte make a big impact in the middle of nowhere!)
Ingredients: (serves 2)
2 “Out of the Depths” tea bags
1 1/2 c. milk (or almond milk, cashew milk, soymilk, etc.)
2 Tbs. sugar or honey, optional
2 tsp. Vanilla extract, optional
Directions:
Pour two cups of hot water over the tea bags in a heat-proof container and let steep for 5-8 minutes.
Meanwhile, heat up the milk until it is just barely bubbling, then stir in the vanilla. Use one of my tricks above to get it nice and frothy. If you’re using the handheld whisk, pour half of the hot milk into each mug then follow the directions for the whisk to create a nice foam in each mug.
Strain the tea and dissolve in the sugar or honey. Pour 1 c. of liquid into each mug, being careful to pour to the side so you don’t deflate that lovely foam. Top with a sprinkle of nutmeg and/or butterfly pea flower powder and serve hot. As you sip, remember: you are not alone. You are stronger than you know. You deserve love. You’re going to be okay.
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Join me for a little winter night magic as we bake this cake full of rich seasonal flavors and black cocoa!